Suddenly There Were Aliens

It was a peaceful afternoon, and Kevin was home from work because he only worked 4 days per week. So this was Friday.

We heard a BAM, and then a car revving, and then something flew past the window out on the sidewalk. We could see a car flying past, down the sidewalk, and then back onto the street where the curb apparently ripped out the under carriage and the car ground to a noisy stop.

It was a cute little sports car with a tall insane man inside.

He got out, and began an unstoppable stream of incomplete sentences.

“Woah! That was not supposed to happen I was just…” and he trailed off, took in a deep breath, and went on, “Those guys really had me in…”

He talks about how he was just driving, and then he fell asleep but only for a moment. How he just does not know who it was that pushed his car onto the sidewalk, or why he can’t start it now. He’s telling me that he is worried the cops won’t get it, some are the kind that just get mean about it, some are the kind that understand.

The way I have recounted this may make it appear that he was more comprehensible that he actually WAS. Nothing really hangs together, you have to PIECE it together.

He rambles about driving 300 miles non stop and nothing like this happened the whole trip until now, and how the aliens were there and he apparently does not like that. His sentences are still broken, slightly jumbled, and occur in fits and stops.

He is certain he did not do anything wrong. He is certain it did not just happen. Someone did it. He does not describe the aliens. We are disappointed.

He swerved at an angle onto the outer edge of the driveway of the post office, and the right wheel went onto the sidewalk, and the other was apparently caught by the curved curb at the far edge of the driveway. That made the car stop heading for the post office door (at an angle), and jerked it back toward the road, where the front left corner of his car slammed into the rear wheel of a Toyota Tacoma that was parked there (hence, the BAM) – shattered the truck wheel and tipped the whole thing inward. He then just continued to careen down the sidewalk.

It was a LITTLE car. It skidded the entire way down the sidewalk between the brick wall and the curb, and then between the fence and the curb. Our car was parked on the curb side in the street, and he missed it by a whisker. Clipped a bit of fence post out of the fence though. Amazingly, he even missed the post office mail box that sat on the sidewalk just one side of the driveway – and he SHOULD have hit that!

It was all spectacularly bizarre. A friend of mine owned the Tacoma, I went out to be sure she was ok, but nobody needed me after that, so I went back inside.

Checked back a little later, and he was still talking. Trying to find the right kind of police man no doubt, they were there by then. His car is un driveable, and he’s mad about that, because he was going to keep right on driving, but the curb ripped out the under side of the car, and it won’t go anywhere now. I kinda wonder how he kept it so straight on the sidewalk, or what kind of race track he thought he was on when he was there. WHEEEEEE!

I don’t know what he was on, I don’t live that kind of life. I don’t know how many of those 300 miles he flew in, and how many he just tried to drive.

I do know we did not see the aliens. They apparently did their dirty work and took off before they could be fingered.

On the other hand, took my friend many months before she could laugh about it. She is the one who had the trouble of cleaning up half the mess he made. The aliens did not offer to help her either.