Leggings. Yes, those. Again…

I followed a woman through WalMart (accidentally, not stalking her!). No, this is not about WalMart People, this could have been one of hundreds or thousands of stores in the country. Any country probably.

She had cellulite. Very lumpy cellulite. Her legs tapered where they should taper, they did. But they couldn’t hold a straight line on any angle, it was all bubbles and blops. She wore leggings… THIN ones (some are thinner than others), not even the thicker “hold it in” leggings, the saggy, bulgy, clingy type.

She had a shirt on that came to the waist of her leggings. They nipped in at her waist, and then curved (more lumps) around her rather ample caboose, and then tapered down her lumpy legs to her somewhat heavy calves and normal ankles. It was a divided caboose, and the straddle of those leggings went WAY TOO FAR between the halves. (It occurs to me that it IS rather difficult to describe her without getting crass with the definitive terms.)

I wondered if she had ever LOOKED at herself in a mirror, wearing those leggings. She wasn’t actually in the minority, those same leggings, and equivalent cellulite (and sometimes out and out wrinkles and folds) were visible on FAR TOO MANY women in that store. And they always are!

People wear leggings like they are actually pants. THEY AREN’T!!! They are PANTY HOSE!!! Even if you are SKINNY they AREN’T supposed to be worn OUTSIDE in the place of pants! They are UNDERWEAR!!! I don’t care what color they are, WE DON’T WANT TO SEE THAT MUCH OF YOU!

PROOF THEY ARE UNDERWEAR… Women DO NOT wear underwear beneath them!!!

If you are overweight, or a wrinkled granny, we can’t imagine having SO LITTLE SELF RESPECT that you would expose such a sorry appearance to the world as shows through those leggings.

Skinny women think they look sexy in them. They don’t. They look EMBARRASSING. I mean really, NUDITY IS EMBARRASSING!!!

They aren’t comfortable either. NOTHING should be worn UP IN THERE! (Incidentally, just because it is covered by a layer of cloth doesn’t mean you ought to SCRATCH there either!) They shift and shrink up and down, and you have to pull them all the time to keep them up over your own ample caboose. NOT COMFORTABLE!!

I can’t figure out why hip huggers caught on, and then to be followed by wearing pantyhose instead of pants… Geez people, just STOP BUYING THE TRASH. Just because someone declares it to be fashionable does NOT MEAN it LOOKS GOOD ON YOU… or anyone, for that matter.

It is really obvious that women are not thinking for themselves. I mean, NOBODY would wear those if they SAW what they looked like in them! Well… maybe a slut or two, but they’ll always choose the tacky object, won’t they.

No, I’m not done yet.

Two days later, I saw A MAN wearing leggings outside WalMart. I kid you not. MEN’S leggings, not women’s. Like sweat pants don’t reveal enough. I know, they’ve been riding bikes in something like them for years, but this was WINTER OUTERWEAR that he thought he was wearing, not sports gear.

No, I didn’t want to see that much of HIM, either!

NOTE: According to a broad assortment of men, they don’t like women in leggings either, and the MORE the woman shows, the LESS they like it. They will excuse bikinis, sunsuits, shorts and tube or halter tops before they will excuse leggings.

They think most women look terrible in them, and those that look good ought to keep it to the privacy of their homes, where their intended target of sexual allure is available for immediate action (men are task oriented, remember?). Otherwise they don’t want to be annoyed by a tease. They prevailing conclusion among men on the make was, If the woman is not available RIGHT NOW, with ANYONE she is displaying for, she ought to just cover up better.

This was confirmed by statistics drawn from a panel of men who ranged from convicts, to porn addicts, to ministers, and military.